Blog of Billy

Had to take a drug test this morning, something I had never done before. I suppose that for everyone, there's that fear that somewhere in your body is a little gland that no-one else has that's pumping out the stuff that make it look like you are hooked on PCP. I was only a little bit freaked out by the possibility. What was much worse was that I couldn't...go...even though I sat in the little waiting room and drank about a gallon of water out of their water cooler. Performance anxiety, I guess. I really hate Ozarka, which was what they had, and until Jackie brought me some Evian before a round once, I hadn't ever found a kind of bottled water I like. I would probably feel pretty bad about my hoity-toity tastes, but it honestly tastes like well water to me. It's the only kind I can drink and not make faces.

Got home and watched some Andy Griffith, and had a strange thought. See, Opie (13 years old at the time) had himself a crush on a girl named Mary Alice Carter, and wanted to take her to a party. All well and wholesome, until I realized that Mary Alice was...about done growing, and pretty hot. She's supposed to be in Opie's same class, but she was more than obviously several years older than he. Looked into it later, and she was about 16. Apparently when the casting department was deciding on a love interest, they had some skewed perception on how attractive Opie was. Morgan Brittney then grew up, but not nearly so fast as her hair. Not nearly as fast.

There's a hunger in her soul for tater-tot casserole, with the crispy on the outside.