Blog of Billy

Went to Norman North to judge this weekend, but, unfortunately, Jennie couldn't come down. She was missed, but the tournament was good fun anyway. I ate well, and was surprised with cash for judging in Norman a few weeks ago. Always good, too, to see all the little high school kids playing all the fun games. I also got to see some of the JV kids from in and around Kansas. Mickey (WSU) and Joe (K State) were on hand to prep out their various teams. I do feel bad for the Kansas teams that came down. It takes quite a bit for a high school squad to be able to go out of state, and for all their trouble, they only debate a couple of teams from outside their own state. It reminds me of Greenhill one year, with Melinda and Fike debating Chris and Clay. Needless. Even better, though, was D3 Districts where Dave and Conor did better than I could possibly have hoped. For the first time since 1964, the University of Oklahoma will be on the bracket for the NDT. It felt just incredibly good to be back in the community after my little bout with invisibility and poverty that has kept me out of most of the rest of the world these last few months. Hopefully that'll no longer be so big an issue now that I'm paying off the bills that I need to be out from under so I can show back up. You'd be surprised how little you think you can do when you have no phone or heat. The entertainment of the weekend (and possibly the whole week) was definitely Steven Foster and his particular brand of super-arrogance. A poignant example: Shareeen had just had knee surgery and was hobbling about on crutches, trying to drag her box down the hall. Steven's response was "Do you not have a dolly? That sucks," and strutted off. Steven is a really good guy, but those sorts of things he does are the reason that we have such a funny interplay, not to mention why Auntie Jan feels the need to lecture him . That and not knowing the word "surreptitiously." Only albino humpback whale...

I really don't like commercials that put a "z" in the word "easy." Also, telling me that herpes is a hassle is probably a waste of time. While I have no direct way to know, that's not outside the realm of my ability to reason through.

I'm getting really excited about getting back into debate. Now that I don't feel pressured to try and piece together a relationship, even if it is single-handedly and doomed from the beginning, I find myself with all kinds of energy that I just can't get rid of. I feel intensely excited about even judging some pretty sorry high school rounds. Even better is when I think about how Jackie's arguments got Conor and Dave to the NDT, I feel like there's quite a bit of opportunity there for the taking. Now all I have to do is convince Jackie to be ok with an OU/OCCC swing team while I bring my grades up.

I don't know if it should concern me that I still feel obligated to provide emotional support for Rosie and her myriad problems, especially when she doesn't tell me any more about them now than she did back when we were actually together. It makes me just sit and wonder what all she's fretting about. Dollars to donuts that she feels lonely and outcast from most of her friends, and specifically the debate squad. It's a shame that she's brought this on herself, but people don't tend to like people that claim that their own happiness is worth hurting others. One of these days, she'll learn. I'm just sad that I can't make her see that. Maybe if I were her father, but I'm just too easy to block out. That doesn't change that I want to help her, though. I can't sit idly by and listen as someone hurts and not try to be comforting. It's probably a personality flaw, but I can't be mean, even to those who have hurt me in the past. Sometimes, if I try really hard, I can ignore them (e.g. bryan), but even when other people are overly mean to them, I have to force people to be nice again. It's frustrating.